No Easy Journeys- Of Mistletoe, Salsa and Guardian Angels
by KK456
Summary: There are no easy journeys. Especially for Tess and Fletch. What if Tess made the wrong decision? What if Fletch had put up a fight for the woman he loves? Will they find a way forward, or will the past tear them apart again?
1. Chapter 1

**No Easy Journeys**

Of Mistletoe, Salsa and Guardian Angels.

**Chapter One...Letting go**

Fletch leaned over Tess' bed in Resus, drinking in the sight of this amazing , strong woman who took his breath away. Even though her face bore the the aftermath of the crash, to him, she had never looked more beautiful.

He wasn't afraid anymore. He knew what he wanted and knew he'd done the right thing by being honest with Natalie. She deserved the truth.

'You carried me through the flames' Tess said, softly, still in disbelief as she looked up at his filthy, besmudged face smiling warmly down at her.

Fletch leant against the bed, leaning down towards her, wanting to be as close as possible. He didn't care who knew about them. He loved her and wanted everyone to know.

'I thought it was the least I could do"

Tess felt the hot tears stinging the backs of her eyes, and knew if he stayed any longer, she'd crumble. She had to be strong.

"You're a good man" she managed through the pain.

Fletch smiled wryly

"Not everyone agrees"

"Make it right with her"

Fletch looked down into her pleading brown eyes and suddenly found himself, for the first time in a long time, thinking with clarity.

"I think were past that point"

"Please?"

"I want to make it right with you" he replied, moving in closer to Tess.

Tess took a deep breath

"This can't happen" she said firmly, hoping she'd manage to keep her resolve. She'd been weak once before and that's the reason why they were in this mess in the first place.

Fletch felt all his emotions rush to the surface. Her words stung, cut through his heart with a knife. She'd stood there and told him she didn't feel the same way once before, and he wasn't going to walk away this time.

"So you don't love me, is that what you're saying?" He asked, hearing his own voice begin to wobble. "So what, you were just going to quit Holby and get a job in some other hospital?"

"I can't come in here every morning and see you" Tess replied, her eyes shining with tears " it hurts too much"

"So you do love me then"

The words caught in her throat, and suddenly found herself unable to articulate. Tearing her gaze away from his beautiful green eyes. Her nod was so slight, if Fletch hadn'tve been looking for it, he would have missed it.

A small smile worked its way onto his face.

"Well, then let's try and make something of this mess and be together"

"No!"

"Yes!" Fletch replied quickly, almost speaking over the top of her. His heart began to pound, and the feeling of sheer panic encompassed him. He couldn't lose her. Not again.

"You have a wife and four children. I'm not going to be that woman." Tess hesitated, her voice changing into nothing more than a whisper.

"Loving you, made me hate me"

"But together, we can make this right!"

Tess sighed deeply

"What we did to Natalie was wrong"

A tear rolled down Fletch's cheek as he considered his answer. He knew she was right.

"But in time- we'll, um..." Fletch shook his head, desperately trying to find the right words. Any words that would show Tess that he wanted to be with her more than anything. " put this behind us. You'll forget"

"Please!" Tess begged, gathering up all the strength she still possessed "let me go"

The tears now flowed freely down his cheeks, and he'd known he outcome even before he'd walked back into Resus. If he truly loved her, he had to let her go.

His bottom lip trembled as he fought to keep it together. He never knew anything could hurt this much. He finally realised what he had to do. He'd lost her forever.

He nodded.

"Okay." He sniffed "I'll let you go. But you have to stay"

"No!" Tess opened her mouth to speak, but Fletch silenced her with a shake of his head

"Yeah, if anyone goes it's me" he said sadly, somehow managing a small smile.

"Besides" he said with a sniff "Charlie' would have ginger kittens if you went!"

Gazing down into her deep brown eyes, Fletch quickly leaned forward, closing the gap between them before she had time to protest. Framing her face with his hands and closing he placed a long, tender, final kiss on her lips, pouring in every single ounce of love he had for her.

As he pulled away, Tess opened her eyes and turned away, refusing to let him see the tears she couldn't keep from falling.

Fletch brushed his sleeve across his nose, and looked back at Tess with a small smile. Wiping his eyes, he turned and finally, walked away.

Tess lay alone on the ward, the only sound the distant ringing of a telephone. She glanced at a passing nurse as she replayed the days events over in her mind. She felt empty, desolate and more alone than she had ever felt in her life. She hadn't, until now realised she had fallen completely and inexorably in love, even though everyone had been hurt in the process. She closed her eyes, and the image of Fletch walking through the Resus doors, came flooding back to her mind. Had she made the right decision?

As her eyes flickered open, a single, solitary tear rolled down her cheek, and plopped onto the pillow.

Fletch sat alone at the counter in the staff room, rubbing his mouth thoughtfully as he replayed the days events over in his mind. He felt empty, desolate and more alone than he had ever felt in his life and the enormity of what he had lost, hit him like a ten ton truck. Should he go and see her upstairs? Tell her, this time he wasn't walking away so easily. The urge to get in the lift was overwhelming; instead he reached over, dragged his bag off the table and walked dejectedly out of the staff room. He stopped in the corridor and took a final look at his surroundings, where so much had happened, where he'd met his soul mate. This was it.

Swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat, he turned and walked towards the exit- out of the ED and out of Tess' life.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two.. A Friend in Need

Fletch stood a safe distance away from the ED, watching as Rita helped an old lady out of the back of the ambulance and settled her comfortably in a wheelchair.

He still didn't know what possessed him to come. He'd second guessed his decision to come back so many times, and still he felt like turning on his tail and running. He hadn't slept a wink, he couldn't. All he could think about was Tess, even on the long drive back from London, and he'd found himself here, outside the very place he'd promised he'd leave. Was he brave, stupid or romantic? All of the above.

"Rita!"

The shout escaped before he'd had a chance to stop it. Across the other side of the road, Rita hesitated at the doors, and looked round, her eyes searching for the owner of the voice. Her sunny smile slowly faded, as her gaze came to rest on the disheveled, forlorn figure jogging towards her.

"Fletch?"

Rita frowned as she looked her former colleague up and down. He looked so awful, she barely recognised him, and it was only the familiar, cheeky grin that surfaced at the sight of her, that gave away his identity.

His jeans and shirt were rumpled and grubby, and his normally immaculately styled hair was messy and unkempt, like he'd just got out of bed. Deep, dark circles clearly visible under his eyes, gave away the fact he'd barely slept in the last seventy two hours, and the short beard that had appeared since his departure, betrayed his age.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, finally finding her voice " I thought you were in London?"

" I was" Fletch replied " I had some things I needed to sort out "

Rita took a deep breath and shoved her hands into the pockets of her navy Holby hoodie.

" You look like hell, by the way"

" Charming!" Fletch grinned, his eyes twinkling " thought I'd get a better welcome than that!"

Rita stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him against her in a tight hug.

" Of course you do" she whispered, squeezing him tightly. " I've missed you "

" You're probably the only one who has" Fletch chuckled, as he released the young nurse from the hug. " I bet all of Zoe's Christmases came at once!"

" Yeah well, what does she know anyway" Rita smiled, nudging him in the side with her elbow.

" So, how have you really been?"

Fletch took a moment to consider his answer. He knew Rita was switched on enough to know that things weren't alright; she could see it for herself. He wouldn't gain anything by lying to her. He'd done enough of that lately.

" Well, I haven't seen my kids in almost four days, I've been bunking on my Sister's sofa, I've got no job, Natalie thinks Im public enemy number one, and Tess- "

Fletch bowed his head as he said her name, the hurt and pain of the last few days was still raw.

" Oh, Fletch-" Rita said softly, forcing back tears of her own. She'd never seen Fletch like this before, so vulnerable, so broken. He'd always been a tower of strength for everyone around him, and now all that was left was an empty shell of the Fletch she knew.

Rita felt her heart breaking.

She gently laid her hand on his arm, and swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat, she attempted to formulate a sentence.

" She misses you too, you know" she croaked.

Fletch's head snapped up

" You've seen her?" He asked, hopefully " How is she?"

Rita nodded

" Yesterday. You know Tess, she won't do as she's told. She doesn't make a good patient"

Fletch chuckled as he imagined the plight of the poor nurses up on the ward.

" No, she never did " Fletch agreed.

He shook his head and sighed loudly as he ran his hand through his short brown hair

" I've made such a mess of everything! How could I have been such an idiot!" Fletch exclaimed in pure frustration. He balled his fist and whirled around to face the brick wall.

"Hey! Breaking your hand won't solve anything!" Rita shouted, grabbing Fletch's arm as he took aim on the wall in front of him. "You're not an idiot! At least not to me you're not"

Fletch slowly lowered his hand and turned to face her.

" Its not a crime to fall in love, Fletch. It happens to all of us. You need to stop blaming yourself"

" I need to see her, Rita" he said suddenly, marching past her towards the doors of the ED. " I've got to make her understand"

"What? Wait!" Rita exclaimed, hurrying after him. " Connie will have you thrown out in five seconds flat!"

She lunged forward and grabbed a fistful of his jacket, bringing his progress to a grinding halt in the middle of the corridor.

" Then help me" he said bluntly, yanking his arm from her grip and pinning her with an intense stare that almost took her breath away.

Rita looked furtively around the corridor for any sign of Zoe or Connie and could just about make out Charlie's silvery wisps through the slight crack in the door. She took Fletchs hand and guided him round the corner, out of sight.

"She's upstairs, room 5a. It's one of the side rooms" Rita whispered, glancing over her shoulder as Jeff and Tamzin burst through the doors with another patient. "I'll keep them busy. Go!"

She said, pushing him towards the lift, as a pair of Leboutins clicked ominously down the corridor.

"Thanks, Rita" Fletch whispered, as he caught sight of Zoe and Ash heading straight towards them.

"Go!" She urged, shoving him a little more forcefully.

Fletch obliged, and stooping down low to avoid being spotted, he made his way stealthily towards the lift

"Fletch?-"

He hesitated and pivoted on his heel.

"You owe me" she beamed.

Fletch winked and darted into the lift just as the doors closed, narrowly avoiding Zoe who careered through the doors with Ash and Charlie to receive the incoming patient.

Rita took a deep breath and made a hasty retreat back to the ED so she could execute the next part of her plan.


End file.
